Hello y'all. I'm still in the hospital as some of you know if you follow me on social media. Today has been...rough. My doctor isn't on call anymore so now I have a whole new set of doctors which of course means changes in medical course treatment. I'm getting so tired of rotating doctors every few days. I just want my GI to call the shots and tell everyone to back off.
The on call doctor doesn't seem to see anything wrong with me using the bathroom 10+ times a day and vomiting or that after 10 days the barium is still not out of my colon(even with crapping nonstop!). They want me to go home and follow up with Oschner's Clinic but I know if I get discharged I'm just going to end up back here in a few more weeks like I did last time. So now we wait for this barium to pass. Again. I did another bowel blast and it is tearing me up and I'm in so much pain but it has to be done so we can get the CT done and see what my Crohn's is up to.
Emotionally: Been feeling really hopeless today about everything. Losing faith in doctors, my health improving and just down that I've lost the "best years" of my life to this disease. But while listening to Kutless's What Faith Can Do God revealed to me that although this may be the "best time" of other people's life it is not mine! This is no where near the best life can get. I have a hope and a future. Then this bible verse came to mind.
Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
And I just wanted to say this to let everyone else who is really struggling with their health that it's okay to break down but God does have a plan in his timing. No matter how much we wish His timing was ours.
Just please pray for doctors to have wisdom and understanding. I'm tired of fighting to be treated like a person instead of a medical enigma.
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